My treasure! They helped
me survive college.
Happy Mothers’ Day, everyone! I wish you smiles and sunshine, love and laughter.
My memoir is a story about believing in oneself, of finding the courage to begin a dream and then discovering the strength needed to see it through to completion. The perspective is an older student beginning college, one with no college preparatory foundation. A person with children to raise, a home to maintain, and a college curriculum to understand. It’s supposed to be a humorous journey of a mother of five through college: how I coped with both motherhood and college.
I don’t know if I was afraid of academia, afraid of going to college exactly. I think it was more like I was nervous about embarrassing myself in front of other adults and people I didn’t know. But aren’t most people worried about that?
Compounding this was the fear of looking bad in the eyes of my children. Let me explain. I was the head of my household. Okay, I shared the duties with my husband, but I was in charge of the home front. I did the homework and projects with the children. I retaught my learning disabled firstborn each day. I was their entertainment more often than not. We were a tight family unit. [God blessed us for sure!] If I did poorly at college, I thought, it would be like I failed my family.
These are some mental issues I address in my memoir. But I need to go deeper. I need to explore this idea of finding courage. And then maintain that courage to gain that degree.
Now because I lacked the courage to begin college, I feigned bravery to be able to register, to take the basic skills test, and then the basic skills math courses. Because I was afraid and dressed myself in a false front, I became edgy and started lacking in my attention to the children, their antics, their well-being, the home, meals. These anecdotes fill the pages of the memoir.
If I think about it, it was more a feeling of being unprepared for college. Other college students, younger college students, had a preparatory foundation that I lacked.
Not having this college foundation tied into my next obstacle attending college: a feeling of inferiority. And it intensified once I gained entry to University of Pennsylvania.